Let’s get honest—the way you talk to yourself about food might be the very thing keeping you stuck. In this tough-love-but-still-loving episode, Kelly breaks down three common stories you might be telling yourself that are blocking your progress. Time to flip the script.

First: A Note on “Tough Love”

Before we begin, I need to clarify something. My version of tough love has been described as… just love. Apparently, when I think I’m being spicy, others are like, “Oh that was it?” So don’t worry—I’m not yelling. I’m just holding up a mirror and gently saying, “Hey friend… we should look at this.”

Lie #1: “This Diet Worked for Me Once”

Ah yes. The classic.

“Keto worked for me once.” “I lost 30 pounds doing XYZ.” “Sure, I gained it all back… plus more… but it worked.”

I say this with love and a virtual hand on your shoulder: If you lost 30 pounds and gained back 60, it did not work.

I know, I know. Ouch.

Here’s the thing: we’ve been taught that weight loss = success. So if the scale went down, we slap a gold star on the diet and call it effective—even if it wrecked our relationship with food and came back for revenge later.

Let’s redefine “worked,” shall we?

What Actually Working Looks Like

✔️ Eating in a way that feels good physically and mentally
✔️ Enjoying foods you love—without spiraling
✔️ Exercising because you respect your body, not because you hate it
✔️ Being consistent even when life happens (vacations, stress, postpartum, deadlines, real human stuff)

If a method only works when life is perfect and you’re operating at 110% willpower… that’s not working. That’s surviving.

So next time you’re tempted to romanticize that one diet from 2017—just notice it. No judgment. Just awareness.

Lie #2: “I’ll Start Over Tomorrow”

If starting over tomorrow actually worked, you would have said it once in your entire life.

Once.

But instead, it usually sounds like this:

“I’ll start tomorrow.”
eats everything within a 10-foot radius
“Okay but for real this time.”

This phrase doesn’t create change—it creates a binge window. A magical little time portal where rules don’t apply because future you will handle it.

Spoiler alert: future you is tired.

What starts as a response to a big overeating moment slowly turns into reacting to:

• a cookie
• a slice of pizza
• one bite of something “off plan”

Suddenly, it’s all or nothing. Again.

Instead of asking “Why can’t I stick to anything?” try asking:

➡️ How often am I telling myself I’ll start over? ➡️ Has this phrase ever actually helped me?

Awareness alone starts to loosen the grip.

Lie #3: “If I’m Hard Enough on Myself, I’ll Finally Change”

Okay. Deep breath. This one’s tender.

If bullying yourself into healthy eating worked… it would have worked by now.

If calling yourself names in the mirror:

• actually motivated you
• made you consistent
• inspired self-respect

…it would’ve happened already.

But instead, the routine often goes like this:

1. Stare in mirror
2. Say unhinged things you’d never say to another human
3. Step on the scale
4. See +0.2 pounds
5. Declare life OVER
6. Eat for comfort

Rinse. Repeat.

Here’s a reality check: if your best friend came to you struggling and you spoke to them the way you speak to yourself… you would no longer have a best friend.

So what if—wild idea—you spoke to yourself neutrally?

Not fake positivity. Not forced self-love. Just:

“I don’t love how I look today, but I still deserve respect.”

That alone changes everything.

The Common Thread (AKA The Actual Problem)

These aren’t food problems.

They’re story problems.

The stories you tell yourself feel like facts—but they’re not. And until you start noticing them (without judgment, without shame), nothing changes.

Noticing is the work.

Quick Recap (Because We Love a Summary)

🚫 If a diet ended with regain and food obsession—it didn’t work
🚫 If “starting over tomorrow” worked, you’d remember the one time it did
🚫 If self-criticism motivated change, you’d be done by now

✔️ Change starts with awareness
✔️ Awareness starts with how you talk to yourself
✔️ You don’t need more discipline—you need a new story